Smyth 312

It is so funny how God uses the craziest things to do work and to teach me so much! So many of you may know that God called me to be an RA this past school year on the 3rd floor of Smyth. I built relationships and shared Jesus with so many of my freshmen girls and it was a hard, challenging, frustrating, and joyful experience. God shattered so many of my prideful expectations that this job would be easy and that sharing Jesus with these girls would be easy. He is so good to break down my pride and remind me that sharing the gospel is NOT about me; it's about the one who chose to be my ransom, who chose to give his life on the cross for my sake. I know that God worked past my pride to move in some of these girls hearts just as he moved in my heart almost 3 years ago with my RA on the 3rd floor of Smyth.

The girls that take the position of RA on 3rd floor Smyth live in room 312. My roommate and I so much enjoyed living in this room this year despite some of the not to so great aspects of it. The ladies that have held this position and lived in this room for about the past 4-5 years have all been such great women that love the Lord and have shared the gospel of Jesus with so many of these girls. I cannot count how many of us girls that love Jesus, are Christ followers today because we lived on the 3rd floor of Smyth and our RA loved Jesus enough to share Him with us! It is so awesome to think that for the past 5 years I can be attributed with these other great women of the Lord that have discipled freshmen girls on the 3rd floor and invited girls into their lives. We have used the Smyth 312 to usher girls in, wiping tears and sharing Jesus' love, addressing frustrations and reminding that God is faithful and sovereign and the command that we have to follow Jesus. It is so awesome to see how much God has done work on this floor, through this room and through these women!

I pray for the girl that will be the RA next year on this floor. I pray that God might give me the opportunity to share Jesus with her or that God would place someone in her life to share Jesus with her. I pray that he would build up a laborer for this floor next year and that his gospel would be made known among these women!

Camp Update

Hey bloggers/friends!
Some of you may know that my friend Linda and I have been praying a lot of things for camp this summer. I have been praying that as a staff team we would recognize our need for community and create an environment between the staff this summer of pushing each other to know more of Christ as that should be the most important thing to each of us in our relationships with each other. I am praying that we would reflect Acts 2:42-48 which says:

"And they devoted themselves to the apostles' teaching and the fellowship, to the breaking of bread and the prayers. And awe came upon every soul, and... many wonders and signs were being done through the apostles. And all who believed were together and had all things in common. And they were selling their possessions and belongings and distributing the proceeds toall, as any had need. And day by day, attending the temple together and breaking bread in their homes, they received their food with glad and generous hearts, praising God and having favor with  all the people. And the Lord added to their number day by day those who were being saved." 

Also, the numbers for hired staff and registered campers have been down over the last several years. Last year we had 27 staff and about 1300 campers. A full camp would be 38 staff and about 2400 campers. So Linda and I, knowing that God is sovereign and he can do big things, prayed that God would provide 30 staff this summer and 1500 campers. This prayer has reminded me so much about God's faithfulness because I think that God is only faithful when he says yes to my prayers. But God is always faithful, no matter what, and his faithfulness does not change because of me, my unfaithfulness, or if he says no to a prayer. God has been so gracious to provide us with 31 staff and over 1000 campers registered for this summer! This is so awesome and reminds me so much that no matter what God is worthy to be praised!

Camp Prayers

Praise the Lord!! My friend Linda and I have been praying for a few months now that God would provide 30 staff and 1500 campers for this summer to grow in a relationship with him and have tons of fun while doing it. A friend of mine reminded me that even if God says no to this prayer He is still faithful. But already God has provided us with our goal of 30 staff and also 650 campers! That's almost half of our camper goal for the whole summer!! Praise Him for his providence!!

Big Things: CONATCON

This week, God definitely gave me the desires of my heart. At the Campus Outreach National Conference, my prayer was that God would teach me big things but that these big things would not be connected to an emotional affection for Christ. I love when the Lord stirs my affections for him, however I realized that I believe the huge lie that if I don't feel and emotional stirring in my heart than what God teaches me isn't important or big. This is definitely a lie and God was faithful to this!

At conference we had many talks, one that really taught me a lot was a great talk by a former staff girl for the women. Based on the story of Esther we were challenged to consider where we find our contentment and where we find discontentment. Am I content with everything the Lord has blessed me with and content that this is the life he has chosen for me right now? And secondly claiming that purpose fuels contentment. I may not be content with where the Lord has me or where he may be calling me but my purpose in being a part of the will of God fuels contentment. When Esther realized that God was giving her a purpose in being crowned queen, that she might help give deliverance to her people, the Israelites, this purpose fueled her contentment. Only when she realized this purpose did she have a peace about going before her husband and a peace about the sacrificing possibly her life for God's purpose. In this moment, Esther was truly living sacrificially. So, what would it look like for me to live sacrificially?

Sacrifice: God is definitely not calling me to give up my life or even put it on the line, as he had Esther. However, that doesn't mean that there is not a picture of sacrifice He has called me to live out as a student. I think God is calling me to give up a few good things that I want because He has other plans for me. As much as  I wish that God was calling me to go back to LP, he's not. He's calling me back to camp. While part of me is so excited that he is calling me back to camp, part of me really thought I'd be going back to LP. But God continues to remind me that Campus Outreach is not meant to have a ladder of success nor is it the only place He can grow me spiritually. He has called me to go back to camp, pour my life into girls week after week, be physically exhausted week after week, deal with the drama of co-ed week, but rejoice in the privilege of showing girls Jesus, my savior and theirs, week after week, and to push my co-workers more towards Jesus, week after week, and have fun while doing it.

Also, as much as I wish God were calling me to live in my same room next year, I don't think He is. God is calling me away from that vision to a new vision: another dorm altogether. I believe he is calling me to RA on a freshmen hall next year in a position that would allow me to live by myself in a larger room with a kitchen. How is that sacrifice? I enjoy having a roommate, I love it actually. I love having someone there to talk to, to laugh with, to watch our favorite tv shows with, etc. I am afraid that I will feel lonely in a room by myself. And I had hoped to live in my same room again next year, with all of my many memories over that past 4 years the room has so much sentimental significance. But God is good and I know He will use me where ever I am and so in this case I am praying that his purpose for me on another hall will fuel my contentment.

In addition, at conference and since I began reading Katie Davis' new book, I was convicted of how I spend my money and I realized that as a college student, I don't need a lot of money. I live on campus (no rent), I have a meal plan (no groceries), I pretty much need money for gas and the few times a month I go out somewhere. The rest of it sits in my account. This is not a bad thing, however I could be sharing my money and supporting efforts for His kingdom. As a student,  I don't have the opportunity to go share the gospel elsewhere other than on campus but I could send others. I decided to allot $30 from my paycheck a month towards AMAZIMA ministries and support a child in Uganda, allowing them to have their basic necessities of clothes, food, medical care, free education and they would be hearing the gospel - about a savior who loves them. This small donation and efforts won't change the state of poverty right now in Uganda but the fact that I can help provide a child with so many things I take for granted and allow him/her to hear about their Savior and possibly come to know him is a gift that is priceless.

So thankful that the Lord is faithful when I am not!


2011 National Conference Recap from Campus Outreach on Vimeo.

Leadership Project 2011 from CO Greenville on Vimeo.

²⁰ At this, Job got up and tore his robe and shaved his head. Then he fell to the ground in worship ²¹and said:

   “Naked I came from my mother’s womb,
   and naked I will depart.^[c]
The LORD gave and the LORD has taken away;
   may the name of the LORD be praised.”

 ²² In all this, Job did not sin by charging God with wrongdoing.

Job 1: 20-22

One of my girls and I studied Job 1 the other day, looking at the hard things that Job goes through, how he trusted in God's sovereignty throughout and was faithful to the Lord even through His trials. As we are experiencing hard things we are praying for the same faithful attitude that Job had. In addition, we watched a video about the Leadership Project. I am praying that this would be God's will for her this summer and that He would provide for her to go! I am so thankful that He has been working in her heart about her relationship with Him as well as the possibility of her summer plans being LP already! Praise Him!

Georgia On My Mind

Specifically, Atlanta. So, the Lord did not call me to go to Atlanta with FCA this week but the city has not left my mind. If you read my blog regularly, or maybe even semi-regularly, you may remember that this year the Lord has been developing a new found burden in my heart for girls involved in sexual violence such as sex trafficking, prostitution, etc. And during my research I was astounded to discover that this is such a huge problem in the city of Atlanta, Georgia. Although I have never actually been to this city, it still blows my mind how I live in my own world oblivious to the violence going on around me. Just a few hours from where I walk the streets of my own town, whether at home or at school, unafraid for my life; with no thoughts of gangs, or violence, or without any knowledge or ability to fathom what some people are experiencing at that same moment. 

And lately I've been thinking about the age old question asked to college students, "What do you want to do after graduation?" And as an education major, I know that if God placed me in the classroom that that specific profession would bring me so much joy. But there's something else that brings me much joy I would not have much opportunity to do within the public school setting - sharing the gospel. Now yes, I could invite other teachers into my life and invest in them, but I would not truly be able to invest a lot in the children. And what about my burden and compassion for girls who experience violence in their every day life?

So, I'm beginning to pray that God would place me in Atlanta after graduation, with a teaching job, with community, but also....gulp....with the calling to labor for teen girls involved in gangs and sexual violence. 

oh. crap. 

This thought brings me so much excitement for the possibilities that could extend from that and the possibility of being involved in and supported in something I am so passionate about and compassionate for. BUT, there's always that other part of me, the part that wants to slap myself back into reality. The part that brings a million, legitimate questions to my mind: "What about my safety?" "What if I have to live in a neighborhood that sees a lot of this?" "Would I be able to reach girls involved in this lifestyle if I don't live in their neighborhood?" "My mother would worry herself to death" "What am I getting myself into?" "What if the school district I have to teach in that would provide me this opportunity doesn't pay that well?" 

All of these are legitimate questions which cause me to semi freak out a little. But all of these questions make me realize that yeah, it is OK to have these questions but it is also OK to not know the answer to them. But at the same time, that is not my role in this situation. That's God's role. It is his place, his role to answer those questions for me. In HIS time. And the reason He doesn't always answer these questions right away is because our response should be trust, worship, faith. I have a hard time trusting in God's characteristics at times. If God's response to my questions is that I should wait to know the answer to them, my response should be to trust in His sovereignty. My response should be that everything is God's intended plan and that His word promises me that He works everything for the good of those who call upon Him. My trust in His characteristics should lead to worship. The effect of trusting in His characteristics is worshiping Him because of His characteristics and worshiping Him for who He tells me He is and that He gives me the ability to trust in Him through the grace that He gave me and through the evidence of past covenants. God's word shows me that He keeps every covenant He makes with His people, in my own life God has kept every covenant, every promise He has made with me and therefore I am able to trust that He will continue to keep those promises and I am able to worship Him because I have seen that He is faithful. And all of this, leads to an increase in faith. The result of this is knowing more of God and who He is, furthering our relationship, and increasing my faith in a faithful God. 

Zaxby's

So, a funny little story about this summer: Upon our last couple of days in myrtle beach and at Zaxby's, my roommates and I were thinking back to when we first started applying for jobs. None of us had prayed about it, and we all had hoped to get a cushy job at Ocean Creek, a hotel and resort, or at Wal-Mart. Sure they had busy days but they also had days where they did absolutley nothing. We threw in a fast food restaurant for the heck of it because we had to choose 3 places. We applied to Zaxby's, Wendy's and Wal-Mart. Little did all of us know we would be getting a not so cushy job at Zaxby's.
When we went for our interviews we were asked our preference in where we would like to work. Me, Katlyn and Chelsea all requested to work up front while Mary and Lindsay requested to work in the kitchen. We arrive for our first day of work and discover that this was not the case anymore. The manager had decided that Chelsea, Lindsay and Mary would be working up front and Katlyn and I would be working in the kitchen. Boy was I shocked/terrified/worried and so many other things. I just knew this was not going to be good. And I still felt that way after the first day: Memorial Day, which meant we were super busy and there was a million people working and I had no idea what I was supposed to be doing or how to do what I was supposed to be doing. After a couple of days and finally some training, I began to feel slightly more comfortable in my job but there was a new problem: our coworker. We all were sure she hated us. Whenever we asked her a question she would give us looks that made us feel dumb, she never wanted to talk to us, she intimidated us more than I knew someone could intimidate me! But, little did I know that God is faithful and his plans are perfect. By the end of the summer I loved working in the kitchen, I had a hard job but I loved it. And our intimidating coworker grew to like us! I even got to share with her our last few days. Now I am just trying to trust that God is still faithful and his plans are still perfect since we had to leave so soon after getting to share with her and building our relationship. I have seen God begin a good work in her and I am praying that he will finish it. My prayer is to trust that maybe we were only meant to plant the seed and not to water it, but whatever the case may be I pray that God puts other laborers for Him in her path, that I can continue this relationship with her, and that one day I will see that she calls Him Lord.