The Mysterious and Unattainable Girl

She hails from Boston
She hates the sound that goodbyes make
She loves Sundays and champagne
She can't stand the winter
She can't stand anything that she can't change, she can't change

She is whatever she wants to be
She is a little of everything
Mixed up so tough in a beautiful way
She's got the world at her fingertips
She makes beauty look effortless
And I want, everything she is, she is, she is
Well I want everything she is, she is

We talked for hours
But she wrote the book on hard to get
No it don't matter what I say
I could buy her flowers
But that's just too cliche to impress a girl like her
And you know I kinda like it that way

Chorus

Oh she is, all I think about
And I can't do without
The good, the bad, the somewhere in between
Oh because I want everything

She is whoever she wants to be
She's a little of everything
Mixed up in a beautiful way

Chorus

"She Is" by Ben Rector

Not to knock Ben Rector, totally love his music but I decided to write about this song too because I think this romantic song represents something so huge for girls, a lie we are constantly taught to believe. This song, and many others out there describe that perfect girl for a guy. He describes the things about her that he loves but at the same time it is so ambiguous, leaving a mysterious feeling and the listener wants to know more about this mysterious girl. So many things teach girls that there is such as thing as "the perfect girl". The only girl that gets the fairy tale ending with the guy. Basically we end up believing that this mysterious, perfect girl described in this song is the epitome of a woman and that we need to be more like her.

The idea that we should change ourselves to become someone else, we continue to "tell" ourselves that who we are isn't good enough, who we are isn't what guys want. We begin to believe that we are not beautiful exactly the way that God created us, we become insecure, and at the end of it all we believe we can actually become this ambiguous girl described in the song. We believe that the characteristics we have and were blessed with by the Lord are not what guys want, ultimately we then attempt to earn the temporal affections of a guy by being someone who we are not. As opposed to letting God bless us with a guy who enjoys the characteristics God has blessed us with. If we believe that we must earn a guys initial affection, we will spend a lifetime trying to continuously earn continual affection and ultimately waste our life trying to achieve the impossible. We miss out on the glorious things God has for us such as grace for our sin, experiencing eternal love in him, and experiencing the love of another through Christ and because of who God created us to be.

You Don't Need Jesus

Woke up this morning

And I heard the news

I know the pain of a heartbreak

I don’t have answers 

And neither do you

I know the pain of a heartbreak

This isn’t easy

This isn’t clear

And you don’t need Jesus

Til you’re here

Then confusion and the doubts you had

Up and walk away

They walk away

When a heart breaks

I heard the doctor

But what did he say

I knew I was fine about this time yesterday

I don’t need answers

I just need some peace

I just need someone who could help me get some sleep

Who could help me get some sleep

This isn’t easy

This isn’t clear

And you don’t need Jesus

Til you’re here

Then confusion and the doubts you had

Up and walk away

They walk away

When a heart breaks

This isn’t easy

This isn’t clear

And you don’t need Jesus

Til you’re here

Then confusion and the doubts you had

Up and walk away

They walk away

When a heart breaks

"When a Heart Breaks" Ben Rector

About a month or so ago, I went to a Ben Rector concert at Furman with my d-group. Ben sang a lot of songs that night, this song in particular being one of them. At the time the lyrics "you don't need Jesus" really struck me, but it wasn't until earlier today when I decided to put on some Ben Rector that I sat down to investigate just how and why these lyrics struck me. I think this song describes perfectly such a huge lie that is easy to believe and one that I find myself consistently living out in my life. During bible study with the girls on my hall last night, we discussed building our "house" on Jesus as the rock and leaning on him continuously through all things in life whether good things or hard things. A lot of times when I go through hard things I naturally turn to temporal things that I believe will make me feel better, or people that I think will love me the way I need and make me feel better. But last night when faced with something hard, God blessed me by giving me what I needed through not giving me what I wanted. I called a friend in hopes that something she would say would make everything better and make me feel better. I think I was hoping that she could say something that would confirm that the future held what I wanted. But we didn't get the chance to discuss what I called to talk about. And another friend I asked to talk to was busy. So right off I see that I ran to my friends to be my rock, to be my foundation, to help keep my house from crumbling during this storm. I believe the lie that I don't need Jesus because I don't see my own brokenness and just how much I desperately need him. But God didn't allow me to find what I needed in them. So instead I have continued to pray, express frustration, vent, and pray some more to God. While I'm not sure if He has answered my prayer yet, I know I have to claim that only He is always available when I need Him and only He can keep my house from crumbling during this storm.